Strings twist them selves around my lungs, squeezing the air out of them. Is that what life is all about, breathing? Then I have been long dead.
Had it always been like that? I cannot recollect how it felt to be happy. Is it because I’d never been happy, or because today erases yesterday? Words written on paper can be altered by simply crossing them, but when you turn the paper to the other side, you can feel the old words pulsing like a heart; they never really went away. You did.
Questions need answers. Answers are more questions. More questions never end. So is knowledge only a mean to no-end? Close your eyelids and the light will challenge them to open. Open your eyes and the pain will force them to be shut again. And between those two states, you recollect the few moments when you wake up, not knowing a thing, not knowing you didn't know a thing. Pray to be taken back to the darkness; the darkness of a womb, the darkness of sleep, the darkness of your heart, the darkness of a grave. Give in to ignorance.
You wish you never knew. You wish you never knew……….
You wish you never knew. You wish you never knew……….
I truly felt this one Maha.
ReplyDeleteMaha I feel the weight of your words. This is yet another remarkable piece of writing. You have a very deep way of thinking.
ReplyDeleteThis sounds so tortured...I hope you do have happy days sometimes. :)
ReplyDeleteThe trials of today have such a strong propensity to distort our view of the past, so that we re-interpret those past events through what we are feeling/experiencing now.
ReplyDeleteI like your ponderings about questions and answers, leading to each other, seemingly never reaching a resolution.
this one hurts a bit maha...i have found that place before and i really hope this was your creative mind not some hard reality...
ReplyDeleteLove the simplicity of the line, "You did." I've been there, too...you expressed it beautifully.
ReplyDeleteKnowledge is a long train journey where you get to hop off at some stations only to get back on as soon as the train starts.
ReplyDeleteGreetings from London.
maha, this was excellent, i could feel every bit of the struggle, the questions that were so daunting! you have outdone yourself and i'm better for it!
ReplyDeleteSo appropriate a tittle... I so often wish that state too...
ReplyDeleteyour writing is magical, "you can feel the old words pulsing like a heart; they never really went away" i imagine ignorance is a blissful state. thks for the comment btw, xo
ReplyDeleteMaha,
ReplyDeleteYour stories are always such philosophical explorations, this one, for me, concerning epistemology and existentialism...beautifully crafted, you weave hidden truths within your striking prose.
There are moments when not knowing is better than knowing like a babe secured in a womb, protected from the cares of this world. When we acquire an experience, especially a hurtful one, s/he may wish to have never encountered the acquaintance because suffering is most unpleasant to bear. However, knowledge and the natural human curiosities are the waters which feed the soul. Very deep prose you have here.
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by and joining. I look forward to reading more of your writing.
i gave you an award!
ReplyDeleteThis is so true. I just hope it was just a story of life.
ReplyDeleteI have seen many people facing such situations. It can be really hard.
Have a good day...:)
this is so very very lovely.
ReplyDeletehttp://itistimetothinkformyself.blogspot.com/2010/05/jingles-may-follower-award-week-2.html
ReplyDeleteawards for u.
Happy Tuesday!
you have a way with words,
ReplyDeletethey move and grab us...
Best wishes!
I LOVE this! Your words were taken straight from my heart!
ReplyDelete